:: The Center of Happiness ::

Welcome to this week’s DRIVE YOURSELF HAPPY Road Ramblings.

If you find value in these gentle reminders and rules for the road, please invite your friends to sign up for my free newsletter by visiting www.driveyourselfhappy.com. Also visit my blog site, www.centerofhappiness.com.

I’d like to welcome all of our new subscribers to the DRIVE YOURSELF HAPPY Road Ramblings newsletter and acknowledge you for taking the first step toward living a better life.

Today’s rambling from the road will include:

* A Few Basic Rules for the Road of Life by Rhonda Hull, Ph.D.
* Update of a Miracle In the Making - An Unfolding Lesson in Happiness
* Enjoy These Videos
* Drive-By Quotes To Carry With You on the Journey

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A Few Basic Rules for the Road of Life
by Rhonda Hull, Ph.D.

Hello Friends and Traveling Companions,

We all hit a few bumps, twists and turns along the way on the road of life. Here are a few basic rules for the road to help make even the most challenging adventure a joy ride:

1. It’s what’s under the hood that counts

C = CHOICE - ability and Consciousness
* You are not a victim of your circumstances.
* IAMNOWHERE
* The circumstances don’t matter, it’s the grace with which you deal with them
* Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a method of traveling
* You can be happy regardless of the circumstances
* Your POWER is in your ability to choose
* Dissolve resistance
* Intention vs. Agenda
* No more back seat driving. Put yourself back in the driver’s seat

A = ACCOUNT - ability and Authenticity
* FEAR based vs. CHOICE based accountability
* Find your authentic self
* What do you want
* Our thoughts and the feelings attached to them are off course
* Welcome mistakes as opportunities to learn
* Be gentle and kind
* Focus on what’s working
* The importance of applying the lesson to the next opportunity
* The importance of having your words and actions match
* Redefine commitment
* Put your W on the line

R = RESPONSE - ability rather than Reacting
* Responding vs. Reacting
* Recognize the choice point between responding and reacting
* Make friends with change
* Big Stuff vs. Small Stuff
* Dare to slow down — unravel the myth that faster is better or more is better
* Communicating is not just words. Listening is more than waiting or your turn to talk.
* Be discerning and conscious
* Expand compassion
* Receive

2. If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.

* Put first things first.
* Create your own definition of happiness and getting clear on what’s important to you
* Force vs. Allowing
* Let the answers come to you
* Have the faith that they will

3. The journey is as valuable as the destination.

* See the value in incremental steps
* Celebrate miracles - big and small
* Acknowledge inner listening and proactive choices
* Focus on what’s working - aim for the apex of the turn.
* What you see IS what you get
* Believing is seeing
* Look for the extraordinary in the ordinary
* There is a valuable lesson and a blessing in every challenge

4. Learn to refuel at a Self-Serve station

* Being centered vs. being selfish
* Balance your tires - Mental, Physical, Emotional and Spiritual
* Others will love and respect you to the degree to which you love and respect yourself
* You can’t drive yourself or anyone else with an empty tank
* The quality of your thoughts determines the quality of your experience
* It’s your thoughts that are miserable, not your life
* Never once in the history of the universe has worrying ever changed an outcome
* Start by becoming aware of your negative thinking mind chatter and exercise your choice
* An attitude of gratitude is the antidote for worry
* Worrying vs. Caring

5. Don’t back up, severe tire damage may occur.

* The past is something you cannot change
* Forgiving does not mean condoning the actions of another
* Forgiving is for giving - It gives you freedom, empowers you, and conserves your energy

6. The road of life is always under construction, expect delays

* Change is the only thing you can really count on
* What you resist persists
* What you focus on, you create more of
* Row, Row, Row Your Boat
* Put hour hands up on the roller coaster, but fasten your seat belt
* Find your own pace - The Tortoise and the Hare
* Size doesn’t matter
* The journey of a million miles begins with the first step
* Perfectionists are procrastinators in disguise
* Strive for excellence, not perfection
* Use mistakes are opportunities to learn
* Be quick to forgive
* Being off course is a valuable part of being on course
* Boundaries vs. Walls
* It’s OK to stop and ask for directions
* Let the answers come to you
* Notice Signs of Happiness

7. Start your engines
* NOW is the only moment you really have
* The most important things in life aren’t things
* STOP making the insignificant things important and the important things insignificant
* Dance as if nobody’s watching
* You are not alone - Ask
* Give and live from the heart
* Be here now. Don’t wait for the catastrophe
* Life is the Precious Present

In Joy,

Rhonda

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Update on a Miracle in the Making -
An Unfolding Lesson in Happiness

Dear Travelers (on the sometimes bumpy road of life),

I am delighted to share more good news about Connor. It touches my heart most to hear Alicia talk of Connor’s ability not to resist, but to walk into the unknown willingly and with complete trust. He remains one of the most profound teachers in my lifetime. I invite you in honor of his courageous journey, to face any little resistance that pops up in your life today with greater grace. Allow your self to notice simple pleasures along the way as he down, and laugh. His sense of humor is amazing. And, oh, he loves to laugh.

Thanks again for your relentless love and support.

Blessings to you all,
Connor’s Aunt BoBo,
Rhonda

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ALICIA’S UPDATE:

Hello to all,

The last week has been fairly uneventful as far as hospital life goes. Connor has continued to improve and becomes stronger with each day. The only obstacle standing in the way of him returning to the Ronald McDonald House is his lack of appetite. He has not had anything to eat in a month. All of his nutrition has been given to him by I.V. in hopes that he would start to show more interest in food and they could gradually decrease his I.V. Since there are a couple of possibilities for him showing no interest in food the doctors decided that he needed to have a scope of his stomach done yesterday. We are still waiting for the results but the doctors feel pretty confident that it is graft verses host disease (GVHD). This is where the new bone marrow (graft) is starting to fight against Connor’s body (host). This is fairly common and even expected after a transplant but we want to make sure that it stays as a mild case. The doctors treat it with a 6-week therapy of ster
oids which will also help increase his appetite. Connor’s white blood cell count (ANC) has also continued to recover and has now been over 1000 for enough days for the doctors to consider him to be engrafted.

Given that Connor has been feeling so good he has been able to get out of the hospital on a 4 hour pass the last few days. Each day that we have been able to leave the hospital on pass Connor is so excited to be free for a few hours, to not be restrained by tubes and being confined to a room that seems to get smaller each day that he feels better. Still as his time of freedom comes to an end each day and he know that he will be returning to tubes, tests, and procedures he accepts that this is what needs to happen and happily comes back to the hospital. As adults we protest situations, even if they are unavoidable, where we know the result will not be pleasant. Had Connor decided to protest every time we had to return to the hospital or go to a doctors appointment it would have made this adventure much more difficult.

We have been fortunate to have many wonderful people here to help over the last couple of weeks. Over the next few days my friend Melissa, Grandma Robin and Steve will all return home. On top of that big change Connor will hopefully be discharged from the hospital. This will be a big adjustment for all of us and seems a bit overwhelming for me as Connor’s care now will be primarily my responsibility. I can not believe it is already time for Steve to go home. It has been amazing having him here as we maneuvered through the highs and lows of transplant. While I wish he could stay until we were all able to go home I know it is necessary for him to go home to get the house ready for us.

Yesterday, as I watched Connor hold Steve’s hand as he left to go have his scope it made me think of how brave he is to be walking into the unknown without showing any fear. He had no idea what was in store for him but he trusted it was going to be okay because he had his daddy’s hand. Just like Connor trusted Steve, I intend to trust in God as he leads me into the next phase of our journey. I know that He knows what is ahead for us and that He will be with us every step of the way.

As I wrote in a previous update our church family had an auction to help raise money for the ongoing expenses that continue to arise. The outpouring of love and support has been remarkable. The money raised will allow us to make the necessary changes to our house so that it will be safe for Connor to come home. Thank you to everyone for your generosity. Words cannot begin explain the gratitude we have for the continued love, prayers and encouragement.

All our love,
The Dunham’s
Steve, Alicia, Connor and Carson

Alicia R. Dunham
5130 40th Ave NE Room B13
Seattle WA 98105
www.connordunham.com

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Enjoy These Videos

The most recent video of Connor’s version of Three Little Monkey’s Jumping on the Bed:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4975680130496606857

Connor singing Jungle Bells:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8102310106978460293
www.connordunham.com

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Drive-By Quotes To Carry With You on the Journey

“It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.”

– Agnes Repplier

Let me
keep my mind on what matters,
which is my work,
which is mostly standing still and learning to be
astonished.

– Mary Oliver, from her new book Thirst

“I like to believe that people in the long run are going to do more to promote peace than our governments. Indeed, I think that people want peace so much that one of these days governments had better get our of the way and let them have it.”

– President Dwight Eisenhower
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If you’re serious about learning some new rules for the road of life that will guide you in creating resilient happiness today instead of years down a very bumpy road, you may want to learn more about my book, Drive Yourself Happy: A Motor-vational Maintenance Manual for Maneuvering Through Life. In it I turn everyday road signs into signs of happiness guideposts that remind you of your wisdom literally at every turn. My book will offer you practical and powerful guidance for having joyful balance in your life regardless of your circumstances.

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If you feel this newsletter would make the road of life a bit easier for another, please pass along. Invite all your family and friends to sign up for my newsletter by visiting www.driveyourselfhappy.com.

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Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if
he gets angry, he’ll be a mile away — and barefoot.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high
esteem. One day, an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said,
“Do you know what I just heard about your friend?”

“Hold on a minute,” Socrates replied. “Before telling me anything,
I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Triple-filter Test.”

“Triple-filter test?”

“That’s right,” Socrates continued. “Before you talk to me about my
friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what
you’re going to say. That’s why I call it the triple-filter test. The
first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure what you are
about to tell me is true?”

“No,” the man said, “actually I just heard about it and…”

“All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or
not. Now let’s try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what
you are about to tell me about my friend something good?”

“No, on the contrary…”

“So,” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about
him, but you’re not certain it’s true. You may still pass the test,
though, because there’s one filter left: the filter of Usefulness. Is
what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?”

“No, not really.”

“Well,” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither
true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?”

– Author Unknown

Be of good cheer. Do not think of today’s failures, but of the
success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult
task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find a joy
in overcoming obstacles.

– Helen Keller (1880-1968) American Writer

I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

Life is sexually transmitted.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days people don’t talk about seeing UFOs like they used to?

Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

We could all take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?”

Why is there a light in the fridge but not in the freezer?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

“If you can DREAM it, you can DO it.”
— Walt Disney”

“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing. The worst thing you can do is nothing.”
— Theodore Roosevelt

“It is no sin to attempt and fail. The only sin is not to make the attempt.”
— Suellen Fried

“Our task must be to free ourselves…by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living beings and all of nature.”
— Albert Einstein

There are many ways to measure success; not the least of which is the
way your child describes you when talking to a friend.

– Unknown

“The road to happiness lies in two simple principles: find
what it is that interests you and that you can do well, and
when you find it, put your whole soul into it — every bit
of energy and ambition and natural ability you have.”

– John D. Rockefeller III, philanthropist

I wish you a moment each day to press the season close
I wish you an explosion of taste, a reassuring texture, a line of poetry to penetrate the carapace of busyness
Until, like the woman who saw her butter dish for the first time after thirty years when the sunlight hit it just right
And the universe is laid bare to the “I am” you always are

– Jennifer Louden
http://www.jenniferlouden.com

Today I am called to write a piece on natural birth for a wonderful upcoming publication of which I am co-editor, Offerings - A co-creative field for evolving women.

It prompts me to explore the juicy question, what is natural? We hear of natural fabric, natural remedies, natural history, natural resources and natural birth… but what does that mean, really?